Looking Back... Emma is 32 Months Old!

So is it totally unacceptable if I write Emma's 32-month-update on Michael's first birthday? Does that make me a really bad mother? I mean, is it really worse than, ohmygod, not remembering his birth length? Yeah. Thought so.

Okey doke. So now that we've established that indeed I'm a crappy ass mom (no, not really - I say that for legal reasons, y'know, in case of a custody fight one day - kidding, relax everyone), I'm gonna proceed with Emma's update. And since she's already walking & talking & has all her teeth (I think), this is just gonna be a quick recap of some of those cute things she says... Or at least things I think are cute. But chances are you'd have to have been there to think they're quite as cute as I think.

Forward. March...



She loves gardening. And, more specifically, digging. But being the girl that she is, the girl that I'm grooming her to be - y'know, so we can enter pagents, and wear make-up and tiara's and stuff - I bought her new pink Dora gardening gloves. And she was so excited she even wore them to the mall - and refused to take them off the whole time we were there. That's so MY kid. I remember every time I would get new shoes, I would always want to wear them out of the store, and leave my old ones behind the box. Now? I do the same thing, only with support bras.

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"I have a surprise for you... in my diaper!"

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Based on that last quote, do we really need to discuss how well potty training is going?

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One evening, a few weeks ago, Jeff had a friend spend the night. Yes, two adult men having what amounted to, in my opinion, a sleep-over party. Okay, fine. To be fair, this friend lived quite a distance away, and it was incredibly late when he decided not to go home. But still... that's just me being cheeky. Cuz I'm like that. Anyhow, At bedtime, Jeff put Emma down in her bed, same as always. And then, sometime in the wee hours, moved her upstairs to our bed, where Michael & I were fast asleep. Something happened, and our usually very sound sleeper awoke during the transfer. And she was PISSED. And not just a little.

She FREAKED.

"I DO NOT WANT TO SLEEP IN MOMMY'S BED!!!!!"

And with that, ran back downstairs to her room, banged on her door, and demanded that Jeff's friend vacate her room immediately. It was just like that. Only she didn't use the word "vacate".

Poor guy had to sleep on the sofa.

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She asks WHY to EVERYTHING!!!

And I mean EVERYTHING.

And based on this, I am not nearly as smart as I thought I was.

I mean, why is it cloudy? I dunno.

Why it the grass green? I dunno.

Why doesn't that man have any hair? Beats me.

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Check it out... Here is Emma & her boyfriend Zachary, off on a secret stroll, while all the other kids at the wedding played in a group.



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The other day (week?), I was struggling to get her shoes on when it was time to leave Bubbie Barbara's house. She was fighting me as hard as she could. Didn't want to leave. Granted, she never does. I was insistant that it was time to go. NOW.

Finally, she just looked me hard in the eye, and with that, said "You're bothering me!" Nice.

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I can upset with her the other day for spilling her drink. Yeah, yeah, she's only two and I'm kinda sorta sure it was an accident. But still. I was irritable.

So what does she say to me??

"Oh Mommy... Reeelaaaxxx..."

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This month has been the month of Role Playing.
She's decided that I'm Emma, and she's Mommy Blum Abray.

Or, she's the Princess, I'm the Queen, and Michael is the Prince.

Or, better still, I'm the patient and she's Doctor Abray. (Yeah, that's my favourite. Except when she wants me to take off all my clothes to give me my check up. That's just kinda creepy.)

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Much as I love EmmaHugs, she generally only gives me what she calls small or medium sized hugs. Big hugs are reserved for Daddy or Bubbie. Y'know, the people that don't follow her around, cleaning up after her, doing her laundry, making sure she's had enough to eat...

And on that note, she also refuses to kiss me on the lips - just daddy gets lips kisses - I am subjected to cheeks. Not even noses or chins. Nice. Love you too!!

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So yeah. No big hugs, no lip kisses. And I even gave her MY CURLS. I mean, she owes me BIG TIME for that. (Geez, Michelle even went so far as to say that Emma's hair is even BETTER than mine. She's my daughter though, so I SHOULD be okay with that...) But then again, she very well may inherit the moustache and chin hairs...



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I can watch my show FIRST, then you can watch your show. How very diplomatic of her, huh?

BUT... she won't SHARE her shows. Like, if she's watching Dora, Michael isn't allowed to. And I know you're not supposed to end a sentence with "to". Shit, I just did it again.

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"Mommy, don't bite your fingernails!"

Granted, I suppose it could be worse. It could be "Mommy, stop smoking!" or "Mommy, don't drink the vodka straight out of the bottle!" And then, maybe, she'd run out at grab me some tonic.

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And speaking of fingernails, Emma is completely and totally into having hers polished - toes too. She actually even asked that they be done for Michael's party! Seriously. And when they start chipping, and looking all white trashy, and asks for them to be re-done. She even sits still while getting them done, and continues to be patient waiting for them to dry. Quite impressive. Hell, even I get antsy during the wait time.

Only thing is... she's not into switching it up. Always wants, in her words, THE EXACT SAME COLOUR. It just so happens to be a bright pink. The EXACT SAME bright pink that I wear on my toes. Cuz, like I said, I'm a finger-biter so no hand polish for me. I so don't get people with ugly nails who wear polish? Why draw attention to something so unattractive?

Look closely at her nails... and tell me, could I have not been a professional nail polish put-er-on-er?



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She now says things like, "This is so cool!" or "That's awesome!", especially when referencing Mighty Machines! That's my kid. Michael got a Big Digger, complete with hard hat, for his birthday, and Emma won't get off the damn thing.

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"Mommy, my gums are wet."
Yes, Emma, your mouth is full of saliva, which is wet...
She thinks about this for a sec...
"That is SO WEIRD!"

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And the absolute kicker of the month...

"Daddy said the house is falling apart. There's going to be wood everywhere!!!"

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If you're at all interested, there are some more summer photos HERE. If I've already linked to this, sorry. I'm tired.

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Oh...

HAPPY BIRTHDAY MICHAEL!!!!

(Seriously. How second child is THAT?!)