2 Children, 1 Husband & An Out-Of-Town Wedding

So last weekend was John & Jill's long-anticipated Muskoka wedding at Winderemere House. Initially I had no intention of going, what with just having given birth to Mick-New, and of course, having a very rambunctious 21-month old to tote around. It just didn't sound like it would be a great time for me. And that is who is most important. Don't kid yourself.

I did, however, decide to spend the weekend up north at Mark & Connie's gorgeous cottage - here are some photos from last summer - but figured I'd just hang out with the kids while the adults went out to play. I even came equipped with a stash of my favourite magazines. Yeah, right. I had about as much an opportunity of reading those as I did when I brought them to the hospital while giving birth to Emma. Uh-huh.

Much as I truly didn't think it would be at all feasible to go to the affair, there was this groom person that seemed to be hell-bent on making it as convenient as humanly possibly for me to attend. So after saying 'no' upteen times, I decided to rush out Friday afternoon to buy a dress to wear to the wedding, in a size I hope never to see again. I'll tell you how poorly my diet is going in another post. As for the dress, always better to have it on hand just in case I should change my mind. Good thing, because of course I changed my mind. Reality kicked in, and it was a wedding I didn't want to miss.

I'm guessing John anticipated that too because, even though I said I wasn't coming up to the day OF THE WEDDING, there was still a place setting for myself, Emma, and Michael (with his own little high chair). Granted, kid is only a month old & can't hold his head up yet, let alone his entire body, but it was an adorable addition to the table nonetheless. That, and all the Godiva chocolates. As Emma said so appropriately, "YUMMMMEEEEEE!!!" I echoed that sentiment. Did I mention that the diet isn't going so well?

Let me back a sec...

We arrived up north to cottage country, Muskoka - the very destination where we ourselves got married, a place where we used to keep a cottage, one that is currently for sale, and that sadly we won't be purchasing - but we did get our boat out of the marina so Emma could go for a ride. She absolutely LOVED it! The water was particularly rough, white caps and all, and our boat is just a small 21-foot speedboat, so it was a very bumpy ride. Kid screamed WHEEEEE!!! the entire time. Little thrill seeker, I tell ya. It made me nauseaus.

It was much quicker to boat to the wedding from the cottage than to drive, and as we pulled up to dock, Mark & Connie nabbed the last available space (we took two boats). But wait... there came a group about to leave. So we patiently waited for them to pull out. And waited. And waited some more. I was getting testy, what with it being 20 minutes to the start of the ceremony and God knows I needed to get a good seat. And did I mention we were STILL waiting for the group to vacate their spot?? Mark went over to their boat for some reason - I thought maybe they had no gas or something. Connie was standing at the edge of the dock mouthing something I couldn't quite make out. I was telling Jeff to honk, and he was on the verge of doing just that, when FINALLY they started their engine and headed off. Turned out it was Kurt Russell. Sans Goldie & Kate. Like I said, we were in Muskoka. Where Hollywood comes to hang out and not be bothered by us friendly and polite Canadians. Evidenced by how we WANTED to honk, but didn't.

Now to fast forward my story...

We arrived in plenty of time for the 4pm ceremony. Had Mick-New fed at 3:00 so he'd be good and full while Jill waltzed down the aisle. Emma was content. Everything was great. After mingling for a bit, we were told to take our seats. And so we sat. And sat. John came out. Mingled with the crowd. Then we sat some more. Emma was getting restless. We let her play with ice. It was stinkin' hot, and threatening to rain. And still we sat. John was looking anxious. The crowd was whispering. Someone mentioned Jill could be in Barrie by then. John's assistant held their daughter over the balcony in a very Michael Jackson-like move. Crowd whispered some more. Mick-New started getting testy. And still we sat. John, on his wedding day, came by to rock Michael. He knows what he's doing - Madison was a very collicky baby. At about 5:15 word came that Jill was FINALLY ready to walk down the aisle. She didn't leave after all. About the same time Michael started hollering. I left for a balcony and stood next to the harpist. Poor girl's fingers were nearly bleeding she was harping for so very long.

As soon as the ceremony ended, Michael & I excused ourselves to enjoy a little boob-milk (as Emma calls it - oh, I suppose she got that from me), while everyone else munched on the floating canapes. Divide & conquer - that's how we started the evening. You take one kid, I'll take the other. That worked out well... for a bit. The whole dynamics of having two kids and being at an away-wedding just wasn't working so well. Especially when it was like 200 degrees, and mosquitoes were EVERYWHERE.

We ended up taking turns with the kids.. Jeff could mingle & smoke, then I could mingle and drink. And on it went. When it came time to have our appetizers (mixed greens with berries, goat cheese, and a honey mustard dressing), Jeff happened to be at the table so he enjoyed his with the other adults. Emma, Michael, and I were positioned on some sofas that just so happened to be right outside of the serving room. How ideal - I got my salad before anyone else! And ditto for Emma and her chicken fingers and fries!! Plus, I had some wonderful serves that kept refilling my glass of wine, seeing as I wasn't able to really get up and wander about with my two little charges. How perfect - priority service all the way around!

A little while later, Jeff came out of relieve me, and I headed into the tent for the next course - it so happened to be the entree (beef tenderloin). Delicious! It was cooked to perfection - rare/medium rare. Who could have ever guessed that I, a 20-year vegetarian, would now absolutely tingle over a plate of blood red cow? And she moo moo moo'd all the way home...

By the end of my steak, I was exhausted. I kept thinking it MUST be close to midnight. I was getting eaten alive in the tent, wondering which of my 46 mosquito bites just infected me with West Nile Virus, and was good & ready to head back to the cottage and call it a night. And Jeff was happy to boat me back so he could enjoy the rest of his night, sans entourage.

And then John, our unbelievably thoughtful groom, had yet another thought... One of their guests had not arrived, and had paid for his non-refundable king size suite at the resort. I could stay there. Nobody would have to leave. Just go upstairs with the kids and crash. DONE!!!

We went upstairs with just the clothes on our backs (and a few extra diapers), and I would have bet my life that it was at least midnight. I was ready to drop to my knees. And not in the way Jeff was hoping.

I looked at the clock. It was 9:44.

(I didn't take many pictures of the weekend - strange for me, I know - but HERE are a few.)